Having major surgery has put much of my life out of control. I can’t move the way I always have. Pain is intrusive. Time doesn’t even behave itself, foreshortening and stretching out in strange ways. In situations like this, I find that I need a plan for self-care more than ever. This plan doesn’t have to be a big, formal production, but rather a set of intentions that promote health and get me through a sometimes-difficult time. Healthy habits such as drinking plenty of fluids; eating nutrient-dense, calorie-light foods; reinforcing emotions such as gratitude and self-love; sleeping well; and moving my body for the joy of it all fall into this broad category that I’m calling “self-care.”
Today my plan contains several short walks, some tasty and nutritious meals, a series of exercises, and recovery from the activity in the form of icing, elevating, and massaging the surgical leg. My plan also includes visits with friends and neighbors, reading and writing, calls, emails, and texts with people I love, and distractions provided by puzzles, television, books, and magazines. And resting. These baby steps are all that fit in my post-op world right now. As I get better, the scope of my world will expand and my self-care activities will get bigger with them.
I set my self-care intentions as little goals I can achieve throughout the day. The stakes are low: I’m only accountable to myself, and anyone who knows me also knows that I am a notoriously lenient boss. Nonetheless, having small goals lends structure to my recovery, reminding me that, even when some aspects of my life are out of my control, ultimately, I am the author.
Stop Losing and Win 