I know, I know. We all grew up believing that women are not useful or happy once their childbearing years are in the rearview mirror. Our culture harps on the negatives of aging for women: the graying hair, the fading beauty, the expanding waistlines, new sags and wrinkles– at 66, those are all too familiar to me. We also have new worries as we age such as loss of bone density, and increased risk of illnesses and falls, and, let’s face it, a memory that is pounding away on three cylinders.
How about cognition? I may not be able to remember the name of the plumber, but I can conceptualize a project from glimmer to completion, something I could not do when I was younger. I find it easy and fun to work with concepts and abstractions– to pick through all that I know and make new connections. I’m glad for my aging brain.
And don’t get me started on the joys of retirement. Looking back, it seems that I spent 45 years running at breakneck speed with no end in sight. There was no time to reflect, no time to think or consider. It was do, do, do. Everyone I know who has retired says that they can’t figure out how they ever fit work into their busy schedules, but I know. While working, there was no time to join that book club, volunteer at that organization, serve on that committee, or read that book. Even working half-time, I find that I have time for everything I want to do (and several things that I don’t want to do but should do).
So, if I don’t count the empty ovaries, what else is missing from my life? How about cataclysmic mood swings each month? And periods I don’t miss them. Feelings of insecurity? Feeling like an imposter? Glad that is over. And being afraid to say exactly what I mean? Give me the pristine panties and chutzpa any day.
Stop Losing and Win 